


Marathon

by htebazytook



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Drabbles, Humor, M/M, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-05-29
Updated: 2006-05-29
Packaged: 2017-11-07 08:27:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/428956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/htebazytook/pseuds/htebazytook
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A movie marathon.  (Duh.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Marathon

**Author's Note:**

> A series of (connected) drabbles. Something of a continuation of [Passover](http://secretgatepoems.livejournal.com/56293.html#cutid1), and the result of [this comment](http://secretgatepoems.livejournal.com/56293.html?thread=62949#t62949). Actually? This was probably just an excuse to see a bunch of movies XD

**Title:** Marathon  
 **Summary:** A movie marathon. (Duh.)  
 **Disclaimer:** <\--  
 **Author's Notes:** A series of (connected) drabbles. Something of a continuation of [Passover](http://secretgatepoems.livejournal.com/56293.html#cutid1), and the result of [this comment](http://secretgatepoems.livejournal.com/56293.html?thread=62949#t62949). Actually? This was probably just an excuse to see a bunch of movies XD

 

 

He finished rattling off titles and looked up to find his associate eying him distrustfully.

"But, my dear boy, you have wretched taste in movies."

"No I haven't!" Crowley protested. "You don't think I watch _this_ sort, do you? This is up your alley, Aziraphale. And your alley is a holy, hokey, yet still bloody boring place. This whole production is solely for your benefit."

"The kinds of movies you do watch aren't much better."

"I watch _good cinema_!"

The angle of Aziraphale's eyebrow communicated "Fast." And "Furious."

Locked peevishly in their staring contest, Crowley just waved the DVD on.

 

 

**The Da Vinci Code**

"I thought this was in theatres _now_."

"So?"

Aziraphale said little during the movie.

Eventually Zimmer progressed mysteriously into the credits.

"Leonardo was clever, not crazy. Um, not _that_ crazy. He wouldn't waste time on crap like that."

Still Aziraphale said nothing.

"Lost your voice-box?

> "If you were trying to use telepathy, you're terribly out of practice, 'cause I don't hear a thing."

"It's nothing. Just that . . . they tried too hard."

"No." But of course Aziraphale missed his sarcasm.

"Just . . . perhaps, if they'd focused where there _was_ actual evidence . . ."

Crowley blinked.

 

 

**Jesus Christ Superstar**

"No." He shuddered delicately. "No. Please shut it off, Crowley."

"But, Aziraphale, don't you want to see Caiaphas' hat? It's almost as big as some of these people's afros."

"No. Please, my dear. I won't ask you again."

"You're going to miss the disco angels who appear unto Jesus . . ."

Aziraphale snapped his fingers briskly.

Crowley watched the desert scene fade to black, Judas' painful sounding wails* echoing in his ears. "Moving right along, then."

"Is there any more? And is it going to harm me, too?"

"Oh, something rather more modern. And it's mostly harmless."

 

*"Singing."

 

 

**The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy**

There was a terrible ghastly silence.

There was a terrible ghastly noise.

There was a terrible ghastly silence.

"Well, thank goodness _that_ never happened."

"I'll drink to that."

"And what won't you drink to, exactly?"

"Oh, you're one to talk, angel."

Later, as the credits rolled, Aziraphale had only one thing to say.

"Dolphins?"

"Dolphins. I _told_ you."

"Well well well."

"Well what? Say it. I was _right_ , dammit. I _owned_ you!"

"Firstly, I'm astonished you remember that conversation—you were dreadfully drunk—and you _what-ed_ me?"

"Oh, just pretend you understand," Crowley said wearily. "It's just so much easier."

 

 

**The Passion of the Christ**

" _What_?" Aziraphale sputtered. If anybody else had said it, it would've come out, _Were they on crack?_.

"Hey! Don't look at—I had nothing to do with—"

Aziraphale glared at Crowley, pointing at the screen. "Snake."

"Well . . ." Crowley floundered. "Well, okay, maybe I had _something_ to do with it. A bit."

"I don't _care_. Imagine if future humans see this and take it seriously? Hmm? I don't believe either of us is keen on a repeat of that _Other_ Incident."

". . . The Bible?"

" _Don't_ try convincing me you aren't at fault."

Crowley grinned winningly?

 

 

**The Passion of the Christ - Take Two**

"Can we try this again?"

Nod.

"Are you going to be open-minded this time?"

Aziraphale gave him a Look.

After a few moments, he said, quite calmly, "Do they know they aren't speaking Aramaic? They do know that, yes?"

Crowley shrugged. "They didn’t really have any way of knowing."

"And that thing they're passing off as the Devil?"

"That'd be a woman thing."

"Hollywood," he said contemptuously. Then, several minutes later, "It's just so bloody, er, _bloody_ . . ."

"Well, yes. Think about it."

"They meant well, but people have died as brutally. There's nothing divine, here." _No passion._

 

 

**The Rugrats Passover Special**

"Last one," Crowley said. Tinkling music commenced.

"You watch cartoons. Involving infants."

"Of course not! Not this one, anyway."

". . . Have you got the wrong reel?"

"Look, if you don't want to finish this marathon which I so _thoughtfully_ put together—"

Aziraphale patted Crowley's hand. "Forget I said anything. It _was_ thoughtful of you."

After much interruption—Aziraphale wanted to know why hair was purple, how babies talked, and etc.—the special concluded.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"How on earth do they to know all that? Do you think we should be worried about this?"

"Nah. Remember _Star Wars_?"

 

 

~*~

  



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